Episode 38: Self-Talk Your Stories into a Better Place
Ron welcomes Steve Norris to the show and asks him to give an elevator introduction as to who he is and what he does.
- Steve talks about his background, which included growing up in the Midwest in a big family with lots of foster children as well, and signing a record deal.
- Then after getting married he transitioned into a sales role and started a few companies.
- Later in life he hit a series of obstacles and major challenges, after which he had a longing to seek out goodness in the world, and along the way seek out a purpose.
- He decided that if it is something that does not bring him joy, he won’t do it, as he was working to find purpose in his life.
Michelle asks him to dive into the story of how he started the Better Place Project, what inspired him to do that, and how his daughter got involved.
- Steve notes that his daughter was the impetus of him starting his podcast, and explains where the idea originated.
- He then explains how his daughter got involved, and what her role is.
- He says how he wanted to find extraordinary humans that are doing good things in the world.
- Steve realized after recording a few episodes that the people he enjoyed interviewing the most were people he could learn something from.
Ron says that one of their principles they teach about is the idea of self-talk, and then asks Steve if self-talk is important to him and how it has shown up in his story.
- Steve explains how quickly he fell in love with the Story in Your Head just after reading the description of the show.
- He then talks about a guest he had on his show, Dr. Shad Helmstetter, who has written multiple books on self-talk and neuroplasticity.
- Steve recalls his conversation with Dr. Helmstetter and all of the things he learned after he started noticing his own negative self-talk.
- Michelle notes that one of the most important thing she constantly works on is improving those stories of negative self-talk.
- Ron adds in his experience of not noticing those stories until someone else points it out to him.
- Steve describes an SNL skit where they were making fun of positive self-talk, and how his mindset shifted once he realized the impact it can have in the actual wiring of your brain.
Michelle asks if there is a story that comes to mind around that mental shift and the impact it has had on his life.
- Steve begins by saying the biggest one is how self-talk then opens you up to self-reflection.
- He notes that while everyone would always say how positive he was, inside himself, he could tell that there was negative energy.
- He says what the best gift he has been given since changing the self-talk in his own head has been the ability to open up his heart to the others that have done him wrong.
- Steve explains how that power of forgiveness has opened up his world for more compassion and new mindsets of dealing with people.
- Ron relates his experiences working through the same stories in his head.
Michelle notes that on Steve’s website there is a phrase, “Celebrate the flows of imperfection that makes us human,” and asks him to explain where that came from.
- Steve explains how loving yourself is way more than just loving your good qualities, but loving and embracing the flaws as well.
- He describes how once you give yourself a break, it is easier to give that same relief to others as well.
- Michelle says it goes in line with a saying she tells herself all the time which is that she is, “imperfectly perfect.”
- Ron continues on this line of thought describing how important being open and trusting is in relationships, and how it can affect the way you understand when someone talks to you.
- Steve says how famous thinkers and philosophers say that trust is more important than love because without trust, the foundation of love can’t exist.
Ron asks Steve if he has any questions for them, which Steve then uses to ask them what the favorite thing about doing what they do on this podcast.
- Ron starts by saying meeting people like Steve is one of his favorite parts of hosting this podcast, and finding the similarities between all people.
- Michelle notes how the podcast has been a huge learning experience, and how frequently she finds others with the “I’m not enough” story she battles all the time.
- Steve relays a story of how the format of podcasts is so old, and yet how much of a godsend it is in order to be able to listen to stories and connect with other humans.
Ron asks how people can find out more about Steve or his podcast.
- Steve says people can find out more about the podcast Better Place Project Podcast with Steve Norris at his website: BetterPlaceProject.org
Join us to hear how understanding the idea of “self-talk” — and what you can do about it — could change your relationships and life for the better.