Ron Macklin & Deb Dendy


Episode 57 Resenteeism

Deb begins by working through the definitions of quiet quitting, presenteeism, and now resenteeism, followed by Ron asking how that shows up to her.

  • Deb recalls times in her life where she would resent jobs, or certain aspects of those jobs.
  • She notes that it made her not only resent others around her, but also herself because she realized she had a level of control over it.

Ron asks that if she resented being there, why didn’t she just leave?

  • She realizes that sometimes we tolerate things because your life has a bigger purpose, such as taking care of a family.
  • Ron works through why he believes many millennials and younger generations are not marrying as early, because they don’t want to be stuck in a job they hate and be forced to do something they don’t want to do.

Ron then asks Deb if she were to toss a line back to her 35-year-old self, what would that line be?

  • Deb answers, “do you love what you do?” and thinks through her working life from points where she loved what she did, to points where she was burnt out.
  • After contemplation, she realizes what feelings it came from, and the impact that covid played in many peoples’ lives in re-evaluating priorities.
  • The story in her head had changed around her job, Deb said, and she realized she was bored in what used to be a job that required her to learn and grow.
  • Ron contemplates what it is like to work on an assembly line doing the same thing everyday for the entirety of your career.
  • He continues this chain of thought, realizing that he finds enjoyment finding new challenges and creating new things.

Deb reflects on how her grandma used to work on an assembly line, but she had a purpose of helping the war. She then asks Ron what story in his head is around that type of work.

  • Ron pulls from a book he once read that said when there is purpose and meaning, we can tolerate all kinds of things.
  • He says that he finds that sense of purpose and meaning when he is solving issues that others say cannot be solved.
  • Ron reflects on a couple jobs where he experienced “resenteeism” and explains why he experienced that.
  • He continues noting how people that are experiencing the same thing often group together, which can lead them to believe that they are justified in their resentment.
  • This makes Deb think about blame, and blaming people or things other than yourself as to why you’re resentful, rather than taking responsibility for your own story.

This leads Ron to ask whether responsibility is something we look forward to and love, or something we run away from.

  • Deb thinks it is easier to not be responsible and be able to put the blame on something or someone else.
  • She adds how being responsible is actually a super power, and you have the responsibility to create your own life.
  • After further questioning from Ron, Deb discusses how taking responsibilities from failing is harder than putting it on someone else.
  • Ron says that he notices this as an ‘easier’ story because you’re not to blame, but in fact it isn’t because you’re putting your life in others’ hands.

Ron says this all connects to ‘resenteeism’ where if you don’t want to be there, you should figure out why don’t want to be there and do something about it.

  • He adds that doing something about it could be just changing your story, or it could be changing your location or company.
  • Deb says that there might be a new “-ism” to introduce, called ‘purpose-ism’, which allows people to create a new story of their purpose for themselves.

Ron then asks Deb why she thinks people are making these words like “presenteeism” and “resenteeism”?

  • Deb says she thinks people are becoming more aware of their situations in businesses, and the story of them being a cog in a large machine.
  • She adds that creating these “-ism”s allows people to realize they are not alone in their situation.
  • Ron says as he reflects on the different situations, it reminds him of a book talking about how people are not being authentic at work and the consequences of that. 
  • Deb then tells the listeners to think about their story, and is there something they are going to act on after listening to this podcast?

To learn more about the Imaginal Community Visit -

Join us to hear how understanding the idea of “self-talk” — and what you can do about it — could change your relationships and life for the better.


Episode Summary


In this episode of “The Story in Your Head,” Ron and Deb discuss “resenteeism” and how it relates back to the stories in your head that you tell yourself. They discuss how taking responsibility of your own story can give you a lot of power.