How to Live Your Stand with Matthew Ames

Matthew Ames & Ron Macklin

How to Live Your Stand with Matthew Ames

Episode 51: How to Live Your Stand with Matthew Ames

Ron opens by asking guest Matthew Ames to introduce himself.

  • Matthew introduces himself by discussing his wife and children, and then his realty business. 
  • He says he is in the business of creating and maintaining relationships.
  • After prompting from Ron, he then describes why he finds being a realtor so exciting, and his process of switching from being an architect to becoming a realtor.
  • He notes that his business is entirely built off of referrals, which means he focuses heavily on forming good relationships with his clients.

Ron notes that Matthew has been working with Macklin Connection for a few years, and wonders what difference the programs have made in his life.

  • Matthew says that a lot change has come in the areas of believing in himself, and meeting himself.
  • He discusses why he heavily focuses on “being enough,” and that learning is part of the process.

Ron asks which part of the 7 different parts of Macklin Method is his favorite.

  • Matthew says that the one that has been showing up the most for him is “being your stand.”
  • He then describes his mindset behind noticing what stand he is being, and times when he is not actively being his stand.
  • Matthew adds that one of his stands is to always show up and contribute, and explains what that means to him.

Ron follows up and asks Matthew what it means for him to “be your stand.”

  • Matthew says that he is always “being a stand,” and that what he is working on is always being the stand that he intends to be.
  • He then works through what that means for him in terms of what he will do, what he won’t do, and what he might do.
  • He says there are times when he notices not being his stand, and describes his process of how he cleans up whatever may have come from that.
  • Ron then questions whether Matthew only has a stand for himself, or whether he has a stand for others.
  • He says part of his stand is to be a stand for others, enabling them to find that space for themselves.

Ron notes that Matthew has led some sessions for Macklin, and asks what it is like to lead someone else through the Macklin Method.

  • Matthew works through what it looks like for him, and why he views it as selfishly altruistic.
  • He adds that his goal is to create a space, and describes what that means and how he hopes others see it.
  • Ron tells a personal story of why creating that space is both exciting and scary.
  • Matthew says one of his favorite parts is the “Imaginal Moment” that happens, especially when they invent a new story for themselves.
  • He then relates this back to his job as a realtor, and how he views stepping into being a coach for Macklin.

Matthew then asks Ron what his stand for the podcast is.

  • Ron describes what his goal for The Story In Your Head is, and how it’s centered on discussing fear, and realize that it’s normal to be afraid.
  • Ron then tells a story of how he came to realize the stories in his head, and how he’s focused on helping others understand their own stories.

Matthew follows up by asking if anything new has developed by doing the podcast.

  • Ron notes how his dad and his relationship has changed since starting the podcast.
  • He then adds how he always learns from the guests they have on the podcast, and thinks it’s super interesting the stories that people have come up with to deal with their fear.
  • Matthew says that as it becomes more common to acknowledge that everyone has fears, it becomes easier to discuss those fears.

Matthew concludes by asking Ron what he intends to produce in the new year with the podcast.

  • Ron says he wants to continue to connect with a more diverse group of people, and help them realize that we all have the same story of fear.
  • He then tells a couple of stories about how even others that look like they have it all together also have fears.

Join us to hear how understanding the idea of “self-talk” — and what you can do about it — could change your relationships and life for the better.


Episode Summary

How to Live Your Stand with Matthew Ames

In this episode of “The Story in Your Head,” Ron and guest Matthew Ames discuss what it means to be your stand. They talk about some of their own stands, what to do when you notice you’re not living your stand, and the different ways in which the Macklin Method has helped them grow their relationships.