Episode 54: Taking Ownership of Our Stories with Marsha Vanwynsberghe

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Ron opens by asking guest Marsha Vanwynsberghe to introduce herself.

• Marsha begins by describing herself as a storyteller, publisher, NLP trainer, in the goal of helping others share their vulnerable stories.
• After prompting from Deb, Marhsa talks about how she began helping others share their vulnerable and difficult stories.
• She discusses how sharing the pain that came from shame helped her feel better, and allowed others to connect with her and her story.
• Ron then recalls how he discovered the space of sharing vulnerable stories, realizing that everyone is scared on the inside, and how nobody shares those stories.
• After Ron discusses different shields that people have, Marsha shares what led to her dropping her shield and being vulnerable with others.

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Deb follows the same line of thinking, asking Marsha if dropping her shield was the hardest step she took.

• Marsha says that it was the hardest step she took, after realizing that she couldn’t continue on in the same way she had been.
• She shares more of her story and another hard turning point that she had to make, which is where her podcast Own Your Choices, Own Your Life came out of.
• Marsha recalls different techniques that helped her slowly feel better over time, which allowed her to make decisions from a more grounded place, rather than a reactive place.
• For her, this included separating herself from family and friends so that she could focus on herself and her own wellbeing.
• Ron relates in how it wasn’t a switch that is flipped that instantly makes everything better, but rather a slow progressive build over time.
• Marsha says how changing her story, and choosing to open up to others allows you to take ownership of that story, rather than wait for judgement.

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Ron, Marsha, and Deb continue to discuss how sharing these stories also helps them realize that everyone is the same, and everyone has fears.

• Marsha says this is what helped her to be able to forgive others, while still protecting yourself and your energy.
• She continues by noting the most important person you have to forgive is yourself, because it allows you to free yourself from things you are carrying around.
• Deb says through this process you can take back your stand for your own life, rather than living into others’ expectations of ourselves.
• Marsha discusses how those breaking those expectations and not comparing yourself to others, allows stigmas to be broken.

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Marsha asks Deb and Ron about a story they have overcome and recognize that that story is connected to who they are today.

• Deb jumps in by discussing how her whole life she always thought she wasn’t enough, and how she’s happy to be free of that.
• Ron discusses his story that he always felt he had to do something to be worthy of love, and how when he overcame that story it allowed him to more easily accept love.
• Marsha discusses how overcoming that story also allows people to give more love.
• Ron shares that’s part of the reason he started the podcast was to help others realize the stories in our head are all made up.
• Marsha then adds how taking ownership of those stories allows us to change them.

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To learn more about Marsha and her story, visit her website: https://www.marshavanw.com/

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Join us to hear how understanding the idea of “self-talk” — and what you can do about it — could change your relationships and life for the better.

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