Episode 57 Resenteeism

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Deb begins by working through the definitions of quiet quitting, presenteeism, and now resenteeism, followed by Ron asking how that shows up to her.

• Deb recalls times in her life where she would resent jobs, or certain aspects of those jobs.
• She notes that it made her not only resent others around her, but also herself because she realized she had a level of control over it.

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Ron asks that if she resented being there, why didn’t she just leave?

• She realizes that sometimes we tolerate things because your life has a bigger purpose, such as taking care of a family.
• Ron works through why he believes many millennials and younger generations are not marrying as early, because they don’t want to be stuck in a job they hate and be forced to do something they don’t want to do.

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Ron then asks Deb if she were to toss a line back to her 35-year-old self, what would that line be?

• Deb answers, “do you love what you do?” and thinks through her working life from points where she loved what she did, to points where she was burnt out.
• After contemplation, she realizes what feelings it came from, and the impact that covid played in many peoples’ lives in re-evaluating priorities.
• The story in her head had changed around her job, Deb said, and she realized she was bored in what used to be a job that required her to learn and grow.
• Ron contemplates what it is like to work on an assembly line doing the same thing everyday for the entirety of your career.
• He continues this chain of thought, realizing that he finds enjoyment finding new challenges and creating new things.

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Deb reflects on how her grandma used to work on an assembly line, but she had a purpose of helping the war. She then asks Ron what story in his head is around that type of work.

• Ron pulls from a book he once read that said when there is purpose and meaning, we can tolerate all kinds of things.
• He says that he finds that sense of purpose and meaning when he is solving issues that others say cannot be solved.
• Ron reflects on a couple jobs where he experienced “resenteeism” and explains why he experienced that.
• He continues noting how people that are experiencing the same thing often group together, which can lead them to believe that they are justified in their resentment.
• This makes Deb think about blame, and blaming people or things other than yourself as to why you’re resentful, rather than taking responsibility for your own story.

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This leads Ron to ask whether responsibility is something we look forward to and love, or something we run away from.

• Deb thinks it is easier to not be responsible and be able to put the blame on something or someone else.
• She adds how being responsible is actually a super power, and you have the responsibility to create your own life.
• After further questioning from Ron, Deb discusses how taking responsibilities from failing is harder than putting it on someone else.
• Ron says that he notices this as an ‘easier’ story because you’re not to blame, but in fact it isn’t because you’re putting your life in others’ hands.

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Ron says this all connects to ‘resenteeism’ where if you don’t want to be there, you should figure out why don’t want to be there and do something about it.

• He adds that doing something about it could be just changing your story, or it could be changing your location or company.
• Deb says that there might be a new “-ism” to introduce, called ‘purpose-ism’, which allows people to create a new story of their purpose for themselves.

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Ron then asks Deb why she thinks people are making these words like “presenteeism” and “resenteeism”?

• Deb says she thinks people are becoming more aware of their situations in businesses, and the story of them being a cog in a large machine.
• She adds that creating these “-ism”s allows people to realize they are not alone in their situation.
• Ron says as he reflects on the different situations, it reminds him of a book talking about how people are not being authentic at work and the consequences of that. 
• Deb then tells the listeners to think about their story, and is there something they are going to act on after listening to this podcast?

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